My
First Cyclo Cross Race By Chris
Colford, Aged 8
In fact I was born in 1964, but I must have a
mental age of eight to have let Paul Tunnell talk me into entering a cyclo cross
race last Sunday with the benefit of a grand total of 40 minutes' experience of
off-road riding, including the warm-up lap of the Guildford course. It's not as
if I'm a Blue Peter presenter or anything.
If you are a Blue Peter presenter, or if you want
to race cyclo cross for some other reason, you'll need:
1. a mountain bike (there's no need to get a
special cross bike);
2. £10 for the entrance fee; and
3. a deep and abiding love of mud.
Based on my one experience, I would define a
cyclo cross race as a one hour event during which 70 or so men and women ride
around a wet, grassy field until they have turned it into mud. Then they run
around it, pushing their bikes along, because it is no longer possible to ride.
Alternatively, they carry their bikes on their shoulders, if they are posers.
After about 50 minutes someone starts ringing a bell at the Start/Finish line.
You then have one more lap in which to demolish any remaining blades of grass.
In truth my first cyclo cross race took place in
unusually wet conditions. Even then there was a short section along a relatively
firm track through some trees. This felt fast and was fun to ride. The grass/mud
parts of the course were fun too, if a bit of a slog in the wet. Whoever set the
course took great delight in making us go up and down short, steep slopes. In
the conditions everyone had to run up the steep slopes, but you could scoot down
them on the bike, and it was quite a challenge to stay vertical in the quagmire
which quickly formed at the bottom.
The highlight of the afternoon for me was when my
handlebars worked loose. As I passed the Agreeable Addiscombe types at the start
of the wooded section I calmly called for assistance. Tool . . . Bars . . .
Allen . . . Loose. Bear in mind that I'd been going for 30 minutes at this
point. I'd stopped being able to breathe after 30 seconds. Agreeable Phil Nash
understood my coded message, and bounded off in search of an allen key to
tighten my handlebars. The next time I got round to the Start/Finish line,
Agreeable Richard (I'm afraid I don't know his second name) bowled up with a
multi-tool and had me sorted out in no time. A very Formula One moment, I
thought. It was the highlight of the race for me because it was the only rest I
got.
If I was a Blue Peter presenter, would I
recommend cyclo cross to the cyclist who has yet to race? Yes, actually. If you
can ride reasonably energetically for an hour or so (think of an impatient
commuting run without traffic lights) and don't mind looking like the Swamp
Thing by the end, you should enjoy it. It wasn't as dangerous as I'd feared.
There was a wide range of abilities. (I was lapped twice, and there were some
behind me.) And it was one of the few situations where being a skinny drip was
an advantage. (The heavier riders sunk even deeper into the mire than I did.
They'll be harder to compete with in the dry.)
You can find details of cyclo cross events at
madformountainbiking.com.
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