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Tales From the Trails

After an absence of two weeks, the Tales from the Trails returns, as for once I wasn't too hungover on a Sunday morning and actually made the station complete with bike, helmet and the energy to actually move more than three feet without having to sit down for ten minutes. My reputation for missing rides due to my drinking on Saturdays had grown to such an extent that when we were at the Bike Show on Saturday, none of the lads would actually believe that I would show up, expecting me instead to go to the Cricketers on our return and drink well into the early hours! To prove them wrong, I actually got up at 8:30 and fettled with my bikes before heading out (so there!!!).

I arrived at the station in glorious spring sunshine to find only two other peole waiting there and my first thought was that we'd have a small turnout because of the good weather - if the sky is laden with rain clouds, it has seemed recently that everyone wants to get out on their bikes. My worries were unfounded though and by the time we set off, there were twelve of us and the promise of meeting another person at the foot of Rachael's Downhill. We rode out through Park Hill and up into the Park where for once we didn't manage to lose anyone; for some reason, the place is like the Bermuda Triangle for Sunday rides and on a few occasions people have mysteriously disappeared without a trace there, never to be seen again. They'll probably all re-appear in 50 years time looking confused and talking of bright lights. Once through the park, we followed the tram lines over Shirley , cut off into the singletrack at the top of the hill and descended into Forestdale along the surprisingly bumpy and twisty cycle path which puts some offroad trails to shame. From here, we followed another cycle path out along Featherbed Lane and met Spencer at the foot of Rachael's Downhill. It turned out that his cassette had decided to explode half way to the station and he's had to nip home to fix it.

Rachael's downhill (or uphill in this case) is usually a twisty, muddy slog but the recent heavy rains had cleared the topsoil away, leaving hard packed flint which offered loads of traction and enabled us to ascend to Farleigh Golf Course in no time. It must be the only trail in the area which is made better by terrible weather. We pressed on, linking the bridleways through to Warlingham and then followed the road out to Titsey Hill, somewhere I'd heard a lot about but never been to. In fact, that's a lie as I have been to the top before. Last year, when the country was in the grip of Gob and Trotter, Pete Adams and myself had set out there in torrential rain to ride the descent. We rode all the way there in the freezing rain and high winds to find that it was still closed, and on the way back suffered from punctures too numerous to mention and a road accident which forced us to make a five mile detour; the after-ride beer tasted particularily good that day!

The Titsey Hill descent is on what is classed as a byway, meaning that it is open to all traffic (some chance). It is on a wide track which cuts straight across the contours of the hill meaning it is very steep in places and incredibly fast. The surface is a mixture of mud, chalk and flint which are all in different and non-uniform patches meaning that you could start a corner on fast hard packed flint and half way round find yourself out of control on wet and slippy chalk. The best thing of all is that from half way down, there is a two foot deep gully which in places has you sliding up bankings and clinging on for dear life in order to avoid slipping into the abyss. Unfortunately, not everyone managed to avoid it. Martin had an impressive rolling crash, Mark tumbled into the hole and Elliot had a bit of a scrape too. Luckily there were no injuries and everyone was in agreement that it was a spectacular downhill. From here, we crossed a road, said goodbye to Mark (who was pretty tired after doing the road ride and the 10 mile TT the previous day - a personal best, well done mate) and climbed a well defined trail into some woods where we came across a steep banking. Marco offered up the challenge for people to ride it and without thinking, I started to scramble up through the bushes to get to the top, followed by Jonathan, Sylvain, Joe and Martin. I personally think that the best way to ride things like this is to not think too much about it first and not look for too long at where you should be going as it'll just put you off. With this in mind, I rode into it blind, picked up a decent looking line and made it to the bottom safely. Next was Sylvain, who took the descent a little more cautiously but made it down in one piece. Left at the top were Joe, Jonathan and Martin, and all three were looking at the descent, trying to work out the best way down. After what seemed like an age, Joe decided to give it a go. He came round the first corner, into the steep, loose section and instead of turning.... went straight on and ended up hanging from a branch with his bike dangling precariously beneath him. We were still having fits of laughter when the branch gave way and Joe tumbled down the banking into the undergrowth. This seemed to put Martin off a bit but not one to give up, he gave it a go. Unfortunately, today was not to be his day and he came unstuck in the same place as Joe and decided to call it quits and walk down. Jonathan, with a look of horror on his face by now, decided to walk the whole thing!

We continued up the hill, onto another bridleway and pressed on through a field and into some new woods. We climbed up through the woods and out into a village green before crossing the road and into some more woods which Marco promised us were littered with singletrack trails of high quality. He wasn't lying. As soon as we were in the woods, Joe spotted a narrow trail off to one side and we picked it up, weaving through the trees like gigantic Sparrow Hawks in pursuit of lunch. The trail opened up again and in seconds we were turning off again into more delicious singletrack which swooped downhill and spat us out onto another fireroad. By the time we realised that we'd lost a few riders (including Spencer, who is the only person I know with a GPS), we must have covered every inch of the woods. Once we'd regrouped, we were all getting pretty hungry and decided that it was probably time for a spot of lunch. Luckily enough, Westerham was only two miles away and the trail which led us there was all downhill. We had got halfway down this trail when we realised that once again, we were missing a couple of people. As one was Spencer, we thought that maybe his GPS was on the blink but it turned out that Elliot's chain had snapped and they were both fixing it. We all set off again but before we'd even got 200 yards, Joe's chain snapped! Instead of fixing it there and then, he freewheeled and got pushed into Westerham so that it could be seen to whilst we were all resting in the sun and filling our faces in the shadow of Winston Churchill (he was born there and his statue is placed in the middle of the green). At this point, Jonathan and Tom decided to call it a day and set off to ride home on the road. It was only after they'd been gone about ten minutes that we realised that Jonathan had left something rather important behind - his helmet. Apparently he realised when he got to the top of Westerham Hill and noticed that the top of his head was feeling a bit airy. With it packed in Elliot's rucksack, we pressed on ourselves to tackle the biggest climb of the day, Westerham Hill. Rather than take the road route, we turned on to the North Downs Way and climbed off-road. Surprisingly, the climbs was a great deal easier than we'd expected and we were soon at the top of the hill. After Spencer had fixed a puncture, we pressed on and picked up a series of back lanes which led us through to Downe and a scout camp which Marco informed us was not exactly the most legal of trails (but you didn't here that from me, right). We were halfway through when we realised that once again we were missing a couple of people and once again, it was Spencer and Elliot - his chain had snapped again!

We rode over to the back of Biggin Hill airport and followed the surprisingly good singletrack trail which follows the perimiter fence, turned out onto the road and followed it through to the Keston Ponds trails. It seemed as though everyone took a different route through Keston Woods but somehow, as per usual, we all ended up in the same place at the finish - by the main pond itself. From here, we followed more singletrack through West Wickham Common and regrouped in Coney Hall, only to discover that we were missing someone - Rik. After a good long wait we rang him up (the joys of mobile phones) and discovered that, yes, you've guessed it, his chain had snapped! By the time he'd caught up with us we'd all cleaned most of the muck off our bikes and turned a tarmacced footpath into a muddy trail. We rode through to Spring Park, climbed up and continued through Foxes Wood, Pinewood and onto Shirley Hills for the last descent of the day through the Water Works trail, so called because it follows the fence behind the reservoir on the top of the hill. The Water Works trail is an extremely technical trail which dips and climbs through a series of natural trenches which are littered with slippy roots and off-camber bankings; it is very hard to do a clean run but somehow three of us made it through without dabbing a foot once. Regrouped, we followed an extremely narrow animal trail through the heather, dropped into a huge bombhole and onto the last singletrack of the day, a recently found trail which is narrow, twisty and a hell of a lot of fun (if it wasn't for the amount of walkers that use it). From there, all we had to do was a quick blast through Lloyd Park, down Park Hill and to the Cricketers which now the weather is improving is the end location for all our rides. For me, having a pint at the end of the ride is the perfect way to finish off a day on the trails. It's a good way to wind down, gives everyone chance to talk about the events of the day and because you've been exercising all day, the beer goes to your head quickly!

So, in conclusion, another great ride which saw a good number of people cover a decent distance (not sure how far, but over 40 miles) in decent weather. I have only mentioned a couple of things that made it a great ride above as I can't remember every thing that happened, but as per normal with our Sunday rides, it was more a social and fun affair rather than a keep fit marathon; I know that I was laughing out loud on many occasions and was not alone in doing so.

I'm not sure what is happening over the Easter break but I'm sure that there will be a ride on at least one of the days over the weekend. Keep an eye out for the Digest later in the week and if I have any ideas, I'll mail you all as well to keep you abreast of anything that is happening.

Happy riding,

Jason.