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Lakes Trip 3

Introduction On the last day of this years Addiscombe Lakes trip, James agreed to purchase one of my mate's Orange 222's and organised to pick it up on the last weekend of November, an agreement which was great for James (who was getting a new bike), Shaun (who was getting a big cheque) and me (because I always love going home).

Friday So, come Friday morning, both of us piled our stuff into the Cushtie-Mobile and headed for the North. After being offered some disgusting knock-off leather coats for the price of hiring a car by a dodgy Italian bloke and witnessing the intelligence levels of the youth of Preston's graffiti artists, we eventually hit Cumbria with the sounds of Klaus Wunderlich echoing around the car. We unpacked quickly and headed out to the pubs for a meal and then to a Glam Rock duo regaling us with the hits of the Seventies and Eighties, before picking up James's new bike and heading home for some sleep.

Our initial idea had been to meet up with a mate of mine and then head over to the downhill course in Hamsterley Forest, near Teeside. Unfortunately, Keensy was on his plantation felling Christmas trees and as we didn't fancy navigating our way across the Pennines to find a forest in the middle of nowhere, we decided instead to head for Grizedale Forest, via a couple of bike shops. The decision to head for Grizedale had a lot to do with the Lakes trip last month as everyone had really enjoyed the two downhills we had done. This time, however, we would be on downhill bikes and could ride the trails as many times as we wanted.

Saturday We arrived in thick mist and heavy rain (usual Lakes weather) and after building up the bikes, headed down to the visitors centre for a cuppa and a fag before committing ourselves to the worst of the weather. Fully refreshed, we began the long walk up the rocky trail that we would be descending shortly afterwards. Although the trail was not as wet as it was four weeks ago (it was literally a - fast moving - stream then), there was still enough water coming down the bottom section to make it appear very slippy. We pressed on and finally reached the top, where we turned and began our descent as fast as we could. Unfortunately, we didn't get to far before we had to stop as our goggles had misted up so badly that we couldn't see out of them. After relegating them to my rucksack we carried on, picking up speed at an alarming rate and fighting with the bars as our wheels clattered over huge rocks and through gullies with water splashing up constantly. We regrouped at the end of the first section and then set off into the lower, using a section of narrow, twisty singletrack we'd spotted on the way up. Through this, we came back onto the main path for a last mega-rocky blast to the bottom.

This was followed by another full run using a different top section and then a mess-about on the lower, rocky section where there was the potential to jump through two drop-offs which I hadn't even noticed the other week. Basically, if you carried enough speed, you could jump straight off the top of a gulley and clear a huge section of rocks that slowed you down if you rode them. This was followed straight away by another drop. If ridden fast and jumped, you hit the bottom section back to the visitors section flat out, which made it interesting to say the least. After frightening ourselves for a while, we crossed over the valley floor and climbed up to the start of the Stone Fox downhill.

Once again, the Stone Fox downhill was drier than the last time ACC were there and with downhill bikes instead of cross country ones, it was going to be a lot more fun. We started off with a full run; me jumping off every rock and ledge I could see and James blasting through everything on his new downhill monster. I had a lovely run down, taking everything as fast as I thought safe and was only slowed down at the last corner, which had a flock of pheasants on it which only moved when your front wheel was almost on their tail feathers. Once James arrived, we walked back up and rode small sections of the track which has taken our fancy on the full run down; basically every ump and drop-off we could find. Once we eventually reached the top, we headed back to the visitors centre down a very fast, loose, rocky downhill which scared the life out of me (I tried not to touch the brakes and only did after the bike went sideways in a particularly rocky section). Once back, we parked the bikes up and went into the café to warm up, have a cuppa and eat some warm food. By the time we left, there was a lake under our table.

Saturday Night As the previous evening in the Fighting Cocks had been so 'entertaining', we decided to head back there, especially as we'd been promised that the band that were on were a glam rock Blues Brothers duo who wore silver codpieces. James nearly got us thrown out of Arnside before we'd even got there by telling the taxi driver about the group we were going to see and mentioning that they lowered a gigantic plastic penis from the ceiling half way through the act (he made that up, honest). The taxi driver replied with "You're in Arnside now" and never spoke again. Oops.

The Blues Brothers proved to be just as bad as we imagined they would be but unfortunately didn't have silver codpieces. We were however regaled with tales of how local simpleton binman Dave had found an 8th century Viking brooch on the beach and believing it to be a purse clip, had thrown it in a bush. He'd also fallen off a cliff whilst drinking Special Brew but had come away unharmed. Just as I was thinking that it couldn't get any better, some girl asked whether James and I would like to go to Lancaster with her as she was sick of the band. We agreed that it was a better option and after James had heard the pleas of her new boyfriend to "not fiddle with her", we piled into her car on our quest for late night drinking. Unfortunately, the young girl in question is a few bricks short of a hod-load. James had trainers on and was turned away from every club we tried, apart from the one I suggested but the young lass wouldn't go to. We wandered around town for a while whilst James tried out his fancy chat-up manoeuvres (which failed, miserably) then headed for home again. Within no time at all, the windscreen had misted up in her car. Seeing this, I put the heater on, at which point she went mental and said that she wanted to de-mist the window, not make it worse. She turned it off and we drove back the whole way with her peering through a tiny clear patch at the bottom of the screen.

Sunday (James's birthday) The previous night, we'd been making loads of plans to go back up the Lakes again but these were scuppered when we both got up far too late. Instead, we decided to go for a local ride, starting with the woods near my Mum's house. Whereas the geology of the Grizedale is grippy slate, around Storth and Arnside the landscape is Limestone. Limestone tends to be covered with soil mostly but where this has eroded, you get limestone paving which is bare rock with grooves in it, and also the slippiest surface known to man. Add to this a covering of wet leaves and no matter what tyres you've got, steering is not an option. It is something that you get used to after time, but it's a while since I've ridden there and was James's first experience of limestone. As soon as we left the top of the hill, we were slipping and sliding all over the place and what should have been a fast, pedally downhill turned into a slow, panicky descent that we were relieved to have got through in one piece.

We set off for Arnside and the pie shop and after battling with the wind and James's terrible fatigue, finally made it to the home of those wonderful pastry delights. All pied up, we climbed for what seemed like ages until we reached the trig point on top of Arnside Knott where we were rewarded with the weather clearing up, blue skies and wonderful views over the estuary and out to sea. We weren't here to look at the view though. Fully kitted up again, we set off down a wide, fast track which was littered with small drops and sweeping corners. This was followed by a bit of a climb before the next descent; fast singletrack which gets steeper and steeper until you think you're going over the bars, before being deposited on the beach. James was now so tired out that we headed for home along the shoreline, before picking up the road to the Ship Inn for a couple of pints. We supped up, returned home and ate our tea whilst watching Superman 2; "On Your Knees". In the evening, we returned to the Ship to get drunk as monkeys with a couple of my mates.

Monday Our journey home was pretty uneventful, apart from us being offered knock-off watches by the fattest man in the world. We popped into Oxford as well for a couple of pints with one of James's mates and reached Croydon at about 5:30, tired but happy.